Taxes Suck. Capital ‘S’ is intentional. I started Girls Can’t WHAT? just over one year ago in late 2005. I spent the first few months forming the concepts for the web site and learning how to actually build a web site. 2006 was my first year to generate sales and I thought I did pretty well. Over 600 of my products were sold worldwide. My website hits doubled every single month. My site was frequently #1 on Google. My Alexa ratings skyrocketed. I gave numerous interviews to other sites that wanted to know how I did it. But when the year was over, all I have to show for my efforts is $242.08. Income minus expenses. Bottom line. Doesn’t matter that I spent the bare minimum in expenses or that the check for the bulk of my sales commission didn’t arrive until January of this year. All I have to show for my effort in 2006 is $242.08. My husband laughed. He still thinks this is a cute hobby.
If you’re expecting some inspirational tag at the end of this blog, you can stop reading now. I’m bummed. I don’t know what I’m going to do. I have a 4-year college degree. I was an honor student. My IQ is high enough for Mensa. The thought of going back to work a “real job” totally sucks. I shouldn’t feel this way. It’s not about the money. We are not poor. And truthfully, Girls Can’t WHAT? has experienced incredible growth in 2007. In just the past two months alone I have earned over half of last year’s total income. But is it enough? Am I wasting my time? I enjoy every second of this “job” but if I calculate my time over the last year, my hourly wage is about twelve cents an hour. This year I am up to just over a dollar an hour. Woo hoo. Break out the caviar.
So am I just a product of a money-obsessed society now? Do I have to earn at least minimum wage to feel good about this? It seems ridiculous. I am far from materialistic – ask any of my friends. Yeah, I have a couple of high-tech toys and broadband Internet, but that’s about it. We don’t have cable TV or satellite. We use good old-fashioned rabbit ears. I have less than 10 pairs of shoes to my name and only two pairs of jeans. I borrow all of my reading material from the library. Our house and cars are average. I drive a 2001 gray mini-van that I hate because it has been hit so many times there are dents on all 4 sides (none of which were my fault – that van is like an accident magnet). Splurging for us is to actually go see a movie at the movie theater once per year. Once. Twice if it’s something spectacular like a Star Wars sequel. Overall, I don’t like a lot of “stuff” so we live a rather uncluttered and minimalist lifestyle.
So why do I feel like I have to put a dollar value on my time? It makes no sense to me. I could very easily land a job tomorrow that pays the big bucks. When I worked in the computer science field, I could earn well over $242.08 in a couple days or less, depending on the job. Do I want to go back to that? Heck, no. I love what I do now. But right now, for whatever reason, it sucks. And I don’t know why I feel this way. And this crappy mood I’m in has reduced my writing to incomplete and grammatically screwed up sentences. Mensa would shred my application for certain if they read this.
So anyway, I just don’t know. I am just rambling. It’s freaking 1am in the morning and I should be in bed, but I can’t sleep because I have some horrid ear-infection that makes my ear drum ring and I can’t stand it. I’m just frustrated. Sorry for the downer. I’m not even sure that I will publish this. It’s not my typical “Rah Rah – You Go Girl!” kind of post. Oh who am I kidding? I might as well be honest about things. What have I got to lose? *click*
13 comments
gretchen
Thanks Amy. I think it was the medication I was on for the ear infection. Once I stopped taking it I think I snapped back to normal. I know, I know…define “normal” 8-|
Amy Stephen
hehehe! This is hilarious! I was walking backwards through your posts that I haven’t read and as I arrived I was thinking, I have to let Gretchen know that her writing is superb! Better, even than a few months, ago, more natural and easy flowing. Then – BAM – I stumble on this bad day where she could use a bit of encouragement. I gave it to you – go back to the top of this post. :-)
Gretchen – you are pretty special.
gretchen
Yeah, she’s ok. She’s related to me so what did you expect? :d
Kel1
Gretchen, your sister rocks!! :D (Because I agree with her. :)) )
vetgirl
Hey Sis,
At least you were in the black for last year. I’m at least -$25,000 or so, just for last year – lousy vet school tuition!! It always takes awhile for dreams to become “profitable.” And it’s hard to put a value on things like enjoying what you do everyday and waking up without dreading the thought of going to work. Hang in there – I think there are much bigger things in store for you than you ever thought possible.
Lissa Weeks
I think the forums were great. I would like to see them back.
gretchen
Thanks Lissa – you are absolutely right. We gotta do something to change the way girls sports are portrayed. You deserve equal support. My intention with Girls Can’t WHAT? was to provide a platform to launch and help support women in sports, music, careers, businesses, etc. Perhaps I should bring the forums back? :-?
Pity Party is officially over. ;)
Kel1
Heh. One never knows with you. :D
Lissa
Ok Gretchen, now stop the pity party. Diva Racing and me especially believe in this site and your ideas. Do you want to know how much my income was for Diva Racing last year. -$1000.00, I actually paid to have this business. To be honest, as I read your post today, it is my thoughts about this race team as well, it hurts to think about quitting the team, but the nagging feeling is there. I’ll email you a picture of the 5th wheel that one of the girls on the team has. It should made you smile. We were busy this weekend promoting your site and we were getting asked about the shirts and your site. The best advice that I have for you is this – It takes a good 4-5 years to get a business off the ground and if you do what you love, you will be taken care of. I know that encouragement does not pay the bills, but something good could be right around the corner. Hang in there.
gretchen
Oh yeah – and the Mensa thing was just sarcasm. I would never want to be a part of that. You should know that. ;)