Besides the word “can’t,” there are two other words that I just don’t like. The words “I wish”. To me, the words “I wish” are equivalent to the words “I can’t”. It drives me nuts when people sit around and say “I wish this would happen” or “I wish I could do this…” I literally scratch my head and think why aren’t they making that happen? If you find yourself saying “I wish” then something in your world isn’t quite they way you want it to be. Change it. And don’t tell me you “can’t”. ;)
4 comments
gretchen
It isn’t wrong to want something to happen, unless maybe you want someone dead – I suppose your wish has to have good intentions. And yes, I am kind of saying by “sheer force of will” but it’s more like just using your brain to make it happen.
Kel1
Well, first of all, you’re NOT skeptical. ;) You’re a very optimistic and open person, from what I see. :D
I see your point, though, about the “I wish” being a self-oriented mentality. And it is human nature to think that our own opinions are the right ones. Otherwise, well…they wouldn’t BE our opinions…duh. lol
But if you’re talking about “wishing” or “wanting” something, then is it WRONG to want something to happen? Are you saying that we can control everything around us by sheer force of will?
I guess I’m not sure quite what you’re getting at here.
gretchen
Kel – “I wish” always has to do with yourself, even when it concerns other people. You may want them to change, but the key word here is “you”. “I wish” is all about what YOU want. If you don’t want your situation to be the way it is with someone, then you must change the situation or your circumstances. You got that part right. ;)
I think what most people have trouble getting past is the “how” part. We tend to see only one solution – the one that we want. Oftentimes we fail to see an even better way to resolve the situation because we have narrowed our focus on what we think is the “perfect” answer.
Another part of this equation (and the one I will probably be flogged the most for) is that most folks (me included sometimes) tend to think that we can’t “have it all”. When we take on that mindset, we guarantee failure. Any psych professor will tell you our brains will stop looking for the solution once we decided we “can’t” have it anyway. If we train ourselves to think that we CAN have what we want, our brain begins to subconsciously bring ideas to the surface or point out things we may have never noticed before. I *think* that the technical term for this phenomenon is the “Law of Attraction”. It’s real and it works. You can take that from me – the most skeptical person you know. ;)
Kel1
Okay, BUT…there are sometimes things that one cannot change. If the “I wish” comments have to do with yourself, then fine, DO something. If they have to do with others, then you must either try to find a way to change the other person, change your own opinion, or change your entire circumstance.
In which case, it’s a whole lot easier to say “Geeze, I wish that person would take a long walk off a short pier.” :D
Not that I’ve ever said that about anyone, mind you. Of course not. ;)